It has been quite some time since my last post, but lately I have felt like writing and documenting our life so thought another blog post would do :)
Life is crazy as ever and lately I have been thinking about how much has evolved in the past 6 months, year, 2 years, etc...Some days it feels like Cody and I just graduated college and other days it feels like 50 years ago. We have both changed so much and grown and matured. Seeing where our life has lead us just solidifies that God has a plan for you and everything happens in his timing. I feel so blessed and grateful for the season I am in and for the job that I have. Being a working mom is so hard but is also so satisfying to me. I feel like I have found a job that I love and it allows me the flexibility to have a true work-life balance which makes being a working mom a heck of a lot easier.
Not long after Madison's first birthday, I took on a new job. I am still at Amazon but moved out of a recruiting role into an HR Business Partner role. Taking that role, I was so scared that I would be making a big mistake. I was comfortable in my recruiting job and have done that role for 5 years. I was scared but ultimately, I was not happy in my job and wanted a better balance, and wanted to work in a role I was passionate about and could have impact. When I interviewed for the role, I thought I completely bombed it. I told my husband, my friends that new, my family, everyone that it didn't work out. I remember when I found out I got the job. I was flying to Pittsburgh on a work trip. I thought about my career the entire flight. I was trying to figure out what was next for me since I obviously bombed that interview and was trying to determine how to get out of my current role so I could be happier and more fulfilled. When the plane landed and I turned on my phone I had a voicemail waiting for me from the hiring manager letting me know they were offering me the job. I was SHOCKED and so happy! Over the course of the next few weeks as I was transitioning, fear started to creep in. Thoughts like, what did you get yourself into, what if they don't like you, what if you fail came to my mind on a daily basis. I kept praying and trying to convince myself that God has a plan for me and this is part of that plan. He will be my strength and is opening up this new door for me for a reason. I started the role in the end of October and 8 months later I am so happy I did! It was the best decision for me. I absolutely love my job and am learning something new every day. I still worry that I am not good enough and put a lot of pressure on myself but I keep praying and trusting God to lead me in the right direction.
Why am I blogging about this? It has been on my mind lately of how much has changed this year. Madison is 19 months old and talking and running around constantly. I am in a job where I can work from home 1 day a week, and be home by 5 most days. There are occasions where I work at night or work really early or late since I am partnering with teams in other countries, but it is not an everyday thing and it is most definitely not an expectation. I feel like I am finally in a place of balance where I can be great at work while also being great at home. I put so much pressure on myself to be perfect in all aspects of my life: Employee/Wife/Mother/Health and it can be quite exhausting to keep up with. I heard a quote the other day that really struck home for me. It was 'Don't aim for perfection, aim for excellence". I was listening to a podcast for working moms and when the person I was listening to said this, I had an ah ha moment. I may not be able to be perfect in everything (or anything for that matter) but I can be excellent. I can give my all and do the best I can every day in every situation. That quote is something I will be telling myself daily, or at least in every tough situation I am faced with. When I am home, I want to be excellent as a wife and mother. When I am at work, I want to be excellent. I want to have balance and not be frazzled and stressed out all the time. I want to find what I am passionate about and then take steps in doing that, Currently, in this stage in life, I am passionate on becoming a more confident woman. I want to be a Proverbs 31 woman and I am passionate to do whatever I can to be excellent at that. I am finding that while I strive to be that person, I am focusing on the excellent part, not the perfection part, which gives me balance. By focusing on this, I am slowly building a confidence in myself I have never had and it brings an overwhelmingly amount of joy and peace that it is indescribable. This confidence is showing up in all aspects of my life including work. I am not saying every day is perfect because it is NOT and I get frazzled on a daily basis and just this morning I thought I was going to lose my marbles when Madison woke up at 5:30 and decided she wanted to be the boss and not get dressed today; but during those times, I say a little prayer and count my blessings and just smile.
https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Proverbs%2031:10-31
